Category Archives: Woody Allen

WOODY WEDNESDAY Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 14

WOODY WEDNESDAY Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 14

The Best & The Rest: Every Woody Allen Film Ranked

This week, Woody Allen‘s 2016 title (for as we all know, there’s one each year), “Cafe Society,” starring Kristen Stewart, Jesse Eisenberg, Steve Carell, Corey Stoll, Blake Lively and Anna Camp, opens after a warm reception as the opening film at the most recent Cannes Film Festival. You can read our take from Cannes here, or hang on to scroll through and see where it lands on the list below, but we thought this would be a good time to gussy up our previous sprawling two-part Allen retrospective, and because we’ve been a little harmonious around here of late and miss the sounds of sobbing and breaking crockery, to rank it.

READ MORE: The Best And The Rest: Every Stanley Kubrick Ranked

Weathering personal scandal and coming in and out of fashion like flares, Allen’s been at constant work as a director for five decades now, and “Cafe Society” marks his 47th theatrically-released feature. Which means we have a lot to get through, so let’s get straight to it, shall we? Here, ranked worst to best, are all of Woody Allen’s theatrical features —with any list this long, there’s bound to be massive disagreement, so remember, the comments section awaits your ire. Or your congratulations, on the slim chance you agree with all of it.

_

The Purple Rose of Cairo13. “The Purple Rose of Cairo” (1985)
Woody Allen made quite a few excellent movies with his ex-partner Mia Farrow in his middle period, as exemplified by this one about a battered wife (Farrow) during the Great Depression. When she goes to the movie theater to escape her troubles, Ted Baxter (Jeff Daniels), one of the characters in the film-within-the-film “The Purple Rose of Cairo,” breaks the fourth wall and comes off the screen to declare his love for her. Hijinks ensue in which Hollywood bigwigs try to separate the world of fiction from reality with increasingly intricate and difficult questions being raised by the wish-fulfillment scenario it posits. The film is one of Allen’s best (he’s said it’s the film that came closest to being exactly as he had envisaged it would) and it also explores our fascination with the moving image in a more serious-minded way than its light touch suggests. In fact, for most of its running time it’s a delightful coming-into-your-own comedy until a perfectly sad, borderline heartbreaking ending that shows up the movies for the beautiful lie they are.

Stardust Memories”12. “Stardust Memories” (1980)
“Stardust Memories” has been called a homage to Fellini‘s “8 1/2,” though as Tony Roberts says in the movie — “Homage? We outright stole it.” Allen breaks a number of social (and filmmaking) conventions before the film ends. He talks about the emptiness of success and celebrity (the ultimate American taboo) and the futility of romantic love. These are, of course, subjects Allen has touched on previously in his other films but never with such a feeling of despair, despite the quips. The dreamy feel owes a lot to cinematographer Gordon Willis, who can pivot the black-and-white footage from lush to surreal to stark from one shot to the next without losing fluidity. The flashbacks that we aren’t sure are flashbacks are equally dazzling, while the Godard-ian jump cuts add to the dizzying meta film-within-a-film narrative. The characters are more like two-dimensional memories brought to life, lacking depth but overflowing in significance. However the futility of searching for meaning within is also one of the last and best jokes in the film: ”What do you think was the significance of the Rolls-Royce?” someone asks. ”I think it represented his car,” is the answer.

Broadway Danny Rose (1984) 8/9

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Trailer: Broadway Danny Rose 1984

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broadway_danny_rose-woody-allen-mia-farrow11. “Broadway Danny Rose” (1984)
While Woody Allen is rightly regarded as a film legend, people often forget that he’s also one of the last remaining links to an earlier showbiz world, having started his career as a comedy writer for folks like Herb Shriner and Sid Caesar, in an era when showbiz promoters were often as colorful as the acts they represented. Enter “Broadway” Danny Rose, played by Allen himself, the legendarily inept yet good-hearted huckster with an unshakeable faith in his stable of z-list talents — “Never took a lesson in her life!” he exclaims in admiration of his wine-glass-playing act. The black-and-white film is told in flashback as a Greek chorus of comedians sit around at a table at the famed Carnegie Deli and swap stories about the agent, and his spot of bother with a mafioso and his moll played by an inspired Mia Farrow. But the plot is merely the hook to hang a series of increasingly funny, absurd and touching anecdotes on, a tribute to bygone days and personalities that also gave Allen himself one of his most lovable acting roles ever.

Related posts:

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen Videos

Woody Allen – Concerto Parigi 1996 – Wild Man Blues Woody Allen & The Eddy Davis New Orleans Jazz Band I have spent alot of time talking about Woody Allen films on this blog and looking at his worldview. He has a hopeless, meaningless, nihilistic worldview that believes we are going to turn to dust and there […]

“Woody Wednesday” ECCLESIASTES AND WOODY ALLEN’S FILMS: SOLOMON “WOULD GOT ALONG WELL WITH WOODY!” ( MIDNIGHT IN PARIS Paul Gauguin’s 3 questions examined!!!)

______________ Gauguin’s 3 Questions Paul Gauguin, now regarded as a French Post-Impressionist artist, was not received well by his old painter friends while living. And having abandoned his wife and children he had no options or resources for getting by. He never found artistic success, either critically or financially in his lifetime. However, there is […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES

______________ Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES Crisis in Six Scenes S01E01 CZ titulky Something about television brings out the nostalgist in Woody Allen (well, y’know, even more than usual), and understandably – it’s a medium inextricably tied to his own early days. He got his start as a staff writer for The Colgate Comedy […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux

First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux Another period piece is coming our way from writer-director Woody Allen. We know little about his latest movie, titled Wonder Wheel, which is typical of Allen’s movies. Rarely are character and plot details shared early on. But we […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY The Performance of all Woody Allen movies at the Box Office!!!

_ Woody Allen Bob Hope Tonight Show 1971 Woody Allen Actor Director Writer Date Title (click to view) Studio Lifetime Gross / Theaters Opening / Theaters Rank 7/15/16 Cafe Society LGF $11,103,205 631 $359,289 5 18 7/17/15 Irrational Man SPC $4,030,360 925 $175,312 7 36 7/25/14 Magic in the Moonlight SPC $10,539,326 964 $412,095 17 […]

“WOODY WEDNESDAY” WOODY ALLEN TURNS 81 5 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE FILM GENIUS

__ The Woody Allen Special [1969] (Guests: Candice Bergen, Billy Graham and the 5th Dimension) Published on Sep 8, 2016 For all the Woody Allen/television fans, here is the rare 1969 CBS special! Featuring the flawless stand-up of Woody, and skits such as: Woody and Candice having to rehearse nude for an artistic play. A […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker

__ Woody Allen The Dean Martin Show Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker News18.com First published: December 1, 2016, 3:30 PM IST | Updated: December 1, 2016 One of the most celebrated filmmakers of Hollywood, Woody Allen turns 81 today. Born and raised in Brooklyn as Allen Konigsberg he is arguably […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering the first of several Vesper martinis. “I was terrified all day today, dude,”

___________ Justin Timberlake Talks ‘Trolls,’ Family Life and His New Album With Pharrell Williams Andrew Barker Senior Features Writer@barkerrant TOM MUNRO FOR VARIETY NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | 10:00AM PT Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen’s 81st Birthday

_ Woody Allen – standup – ’65 – RARE! Happy 81st Birthday, Woody Allen December 2, 2016 1 Comment Woody Allen turns 81 today. And he shows no signs of slowing down. Allen spent his 80th year being remarkably prolific, even by his own standards. The end of 2015 saw that year’s film, Irrational Man, […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016

  _ Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016 3 Comments Woody Allen has, it seems, wrapped production on his 2017 Film. The new film stars Kate Winlset and Justin Timberlake. And despite some very public days of shooting, We still don’t know that much […]

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WOODY WEDNESDAY Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 13

WOODY WEDNESDAY Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 13

The Best & The Rest: Every Woody Allen Film Ranked

This week, Woody Allen‘s 2016 title (for as we all know, there’s one each year), “Cafe Society,” starring Kristen Stewart, Jesse Eisenberg, Steve Carell, Corey Stoll, Blake Lively and Anna Camp, opens after a warm reception as the opening film at the most recent Cannes Film Festival. You can read our take from Cannes here, or hang on to scroll through and see where it lands on the list below, but we thought this would be a good time to gussy up our previous sprawling two-part Allen retrospective, and because we’ve been a little harmonious around here of late and miss the sounds of sobbing and breaking crockery, to rank it.

READ MORE: The Best And The Rest: Every Stanley Kubrick Ranked

Weathering personal scandal and coming in and out of fashion like flares, Allen’s been at constant work as a director for five decades now, and “Cafe Society” marks his 47th theatrically-released feature. Which means we have a lot to get through, so let’s get straight to it, shall we? Here, ranked worst to best, are all of Woody Allen’s theatrical features —with any list this long, there’s bound to be massive disagreement, so remember, the comments section awaits your ire. Or your congratulations, on the slim chance you agree with all of it.

_

 

zelig-woody-allen16. “Zelig” (1983)
A curio in a filmography that is distinguished by repeating themes, “Zelig” dresses Allen’s typical gripes and philosophizing up in a pioneering mockumentary package. Presented as a black-and-white documentary on Leonard Zelig (Allen), the “human chameleon”, the film is a portrait of a misfit accepted by society when he discovers the power to literally metamorphose into the people around him. With the use of then still-innovative blue screen tech, Allen hobnobs with Calvin Coolidge and comes within shooting distance of Adolf Hitler. The efforts to make the film look like an authentically aged piece of history are impressive even if they’ve been supplanted by the likes of “Forrest Gump” since, while a romance between Zelig and Dr. Fletcher (Mia Farrow) is sweet if thinly plotted. It’s more likely you’ll enjoy the film for the historical cameos, for the cleverness of the juggling between fact and fiction and for modern-day legends, like Saul Bellow and Susan Sontag who despite not being renowned as laugh-riots, manage to keep admirably straight faces while commenting on the phenomenon as if it really happened.

Take the Money and Run Woody Allen

 

 

15. “Take The Money And Run” (1969)
Somewhat obscured by Allen’s more polished films to come, this solo directorial debut could, pound for pound, be the funniest film he’s ever made, because all he wants to do here is make you laugh. Told in the format of a fake documentary, a creative decision well before its time, “Take The Money And Run” follows the story of Virgil Starkwell, a criminal who robs banks in lieu of a successful professional life in the, ahem, legal sector. As Virgil stacks up ignominies, we see the first stirrings of Allen’s romantic side, with a genuine relationship that develops amongst the madcap slapstick with Janet Margolin’s Louise. ‘Money’ manages to have this human center but still emphasizes the gags at the heart of the picture, in some ways establishing a template for heartfelt spoof that would later be credited erroneously to “Airplane!” Allen would go on to make pictures with more weighty ideas and concepts, but bits like the botched stickup attempt, the rainy prison escape with a gun made of soap and the utter slapstick genius of Virgil playing the cello in a marching band are some of the funniest moments ever committed to celluloid.

Manhattan Murder Mystery (1993) – Official Trailer

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manhattan-murder-mystery-woody-allen-1214.“Manhattan Murder Mystery” (1993)
It’s a strange world: in the throes of devastating personal scandal, Allen turned in his funniest, most optimistic and delightful film in years. In fact, two of the changes made as a result of outside pressures probably improved the film immeasurably: casting a spiky Anjelica Huston instead of a much younger actress to give Allen a slightly more age-appropriate flirtation, and more importantly, replacing Mia Farrow with a beguiling Diane Keaton — against whom a mock-irate Allen subsequently railed for getting more laughs than he does, despite the fact he’d written the material to make him look like the funny one. Actually, they’re both on top form, and the portrait of a long-term marriage that finds much-needed spice when a neighbor dies (finally turning to the murder sub-plot famously excised from “Annie Hall”), is one of the most endearing depictions of an adult relationship that Allen has ever managed. It’s peppered with allusions to classic films, fun until the end when it unashamedly rips one off, but that’s just nitpicking, especially in a movie that sends you giggling into the credits on a final gag worthy of Billy Wilder and I.A.L Diamond.

Related posts:

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen Videos

Woody Allen – Concerto Parigi 1996 – Wild Man Blues Woody Allen & The Eddy Davis New Orleans Jazz Band I have spent alot of time talking about Woody Allen films on this blog and looking at his worldview. He has a hopeless, meaningless, nihilistic worldview that believes we are going to turn to dust and there […]

“Woody Wednesday” ECCLESIASTES AND WOODY ALLEN’S FILMS: SOLOMON “WOULD GOT ALONG WELL WITH WOODY!” ( MIDNIGHT IN PARIS Paul Gauguin’s 3 questions examined!!!)

______________ Gauguin’s 3 Questions Paul Gauguin, now regarded as a French Post-Impressionist artist, was not received well by his old painter friends while living. And having abandoned his wife and children he had no options or resources for getting by. He never found artistic success, either critically or financially in his lifetime. However, there is […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES

______________ Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES Crisis in Six Scenes S01E01 CZ titulky Something about television brings out the nostalgist in Woody Allen (well, y’know, even more than usual), and understandably – it’s a medium inextricably tied to his own early days. He got his start as a staff writer for The Colgate Comedy […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux

First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux Another period piece is coming our way from writer-director Woody Allen. We know little about his latest movie, titled Wonder Wheel, which is typical of Allen’s movies. Rarely are character and plot details shared early on. But we […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY The Performance of all Woody Allen movies at the Box Office!!!

_ Woody Allen Bob Hope Tonight Show 1971 Woody Allen Actor Director Writer Date Title (click to view) Studio Lifetime Gross / Theaters Opening / Theaters Rank 7/15/16 Cafe Society LGF $11,103,205 631 $359,289 5 18 7/17/15 Irrational Man SPC $4,030,360 925 $175,312 7 36 7/25/14 Magic in the Moonlight SPC $10,539,326 964 $412,095 17 […]

“WOODY WEDNESDAY” WOODY ALLEN TURNS 81 5 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE FILM GENIUS

__ The Woody Allen Special [1969] (Guests: Candice Bergen, Billy Graham and the 5th Dimension) Published on Sep 8, 2016 For all the Woody Allen/television fans, here is the rare 1969 CBS special! Featuring the flawless stand-up of Woody, and skits such as: Woody and Candice having to rehearse nude for an artistic play. A […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker

__ Woody Allen The Dean Martin Show Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker News18.com First published: December 1, 2016, 3:30 PM IST | Updated: December 1, 2016 One of the most celebrated filmmakers of Hollywood, Woody Allen turns 81 today. Born and raised in Brooklyn as Allen Konigsberg he is arguably […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering the first of several Vesper martinis. “I was terrified all day today, dude,”

___________ Justin Timberlake Talks ‘Trolls,’ Family Life and His New Album With Pharrell Williams Andrew Barker Senior Features Writer@barkerrant TOM MUNRO FOR VARIETY NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | 10:00AM PT Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen’s 81st Birthday

_ Woody Allen – standup – ’65 – RARE! Happy 81st Birthday, Woody Allen December 2, 2016 1 Comment Woody Allen turns 81 today. And he shows no signs of slowing down. Allen spent his 80th year being remarkably prolific, even by his own standards. The end of 2015 saw that year’s film, Irrational Man, […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016

  _ Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016 3 Comments Woody Allen has, it seems, wrapped production on his 2017 Film. The new film stars Kate Winlset and Justin Timberlake. And despite some very public days of shooting, We still don’t know that much […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 12

WOODY WEDNESDAY Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 12

The Best & The Rest: Every Woody Allen Film Ranked

This week, Woody Allen‘s 2016 title (for as we all know, there’s one each year), “Cafe Society,” starring Kristen Stewart, Jesse Eisenberg, Steve Carell, Corey Stoll, Blake Lively and Anna Camp, opens after a warm reception as the opening film at the most recent Cannes Film Festival. You can read our take from Cannes here, or hang on to scroll through and see where it lands on the list below, but we thought this would be a good time to gussy up our previous sprawling two-part Allen retrospective, and because we’ve been a little harmonious around here of late and miss the sounds of sobbing and breaking crockery, to rank it.

READ MORE: The Best And The Rest: Every Stanley Kubrick Ranked

Weathering personal scandal and coming in and out of fashion like flares, Allen’s been at constant work as a director for five decades now, and “Cafe Society” marks his 47th theatrically-released feature. Which means we have a lot to get through, so let’s get straight to it, shall we? Here, ranked worst to best, are all of Woody Allen’s theatrical features —with any list this long, there’s bound to be massive disagreement, so remember, the comments section awaits your ire. Or your congratulations, on the slim chance you agree with all of it.

Blue Jasmine Official Trailer #1 (2013) – Woody Allen Movie HD

 

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Blue-Jasmine-woody-allen-cate-blanchett18. “Blue Jasmine” (2013)
When Allen’s on form there is no better (male) writer/director of complicated and “difficult” female roles, and when that talent meets an actress on form, the results have been spectacular (think of Judy Davis in “Husbands and Wives,” Dianne Wiest in “Hannah and her Sisters” or Diane Keaton in “Annie Hall“). But the only time in recent years the stars have aligned in a comparable manner is with Cate Blanchett‘s Oscar-winning turn in “Blue Jasmine.” Supported by the always-terrific Sally Hawkins, the suddenly resourceless and disgraced socialite Jasmine is a self-involved, neurotic nightmare and Blanchett is fearless about plumbing her absolute lowest depths. In fact, her performance is so stellar, it kind of blasts the rest of the film, which involves not the most engaging or insightful plot Allen has ever delivered, off the screen. “Blue Jasmine” could have been stronger in other departments, especially as its themes of affluence vanished overnight as a result of shady financial deals has more pointed topicality than we usually see from Allen. But as it is it’s almost wholly a vehicle for a towering Blanchett, and who can complain about that?

 

Bananas (1971) – Trailer – Woody Allen

 

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Bananas17. “Bananas” (1971)
Opening with one of his all-time best set pieces — the assassination of a foreign dictator being covered by a Howard Cosell and edited at a brisk, dare we say, experimental clip — if “Bananas” is ultimately not the most rewarding of Allen’s earlier, wackier films, it is still a lot of fun, combining moments of sublime silliness with more standard-issue observational New York living stuff. The foreign plot, which involves Allen becoming the leader of a fictional South American country in order to impress a girl, is less successful than the rest of the film, seemingly based on a mash-up of his short story writing and somewhat surrealist stand-up routines, that doesn’t quite work when translated to film. But the more familiar Allen-Manhattan-relationship stuff is an early goldmine, that includes a hilarious break-up sequence when Allen and his paramour discuss “giving” and “receiving” endlessly. “Bananas” never quite reaches the gonzo highs of “Love and Death,” and while it remains probably less dated than “Sleeper” is also lacks that film’s most inspired highs. But it’s does have what no other Allen film can boast: Sylvester Stallone in an early scene as a subway mugger.

Related posts:

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen Videos

Woody Allen – Concerto Parigi 1996 – Wild Man Blues Woody Allen & The Eddy Davis New Orleans Jazz Band I have spent alot of time talking about Woody Allen films on this blog and looking at his worldview. He has a hopeless, meaningless, nihilistic worldview that believes we are going to turn to dust and there […]

“Woody Wednesday” ECCLESIASTES AND WOODY ALLEN’S FILMS: SOLOMON “WOULD GOT ALONG WELL WITH WOODY!” ( MIDNIGHT IN PARIS Paul Gauguin’s 3 questions examined!!!)

______________ Gauguin’s 3 Questions Paul Gauguin, now regarded as a French Post-Impressionist artist, was not received well by his old painter friends while living. And having abandoned his wife and children he had no options or resources for getting by. He never found artistic success, either critically or financially in his lifetime. However, there is […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES

______________ Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES Crisis in Six Scenes S01E01 CZ titulky Something about television brings out the nostalgist in Woody Allen (well, y’know, even more than usual), and understandably – it’s a medium inextricably tied to his own early days. He got his start as a staff writer for The Colgate Comedy […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux

First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux Another period piece is coming our way from writer-director Woody Allen. We know little about his latest movie, titled Wonder Wheel, which is typical of Allen’s movies. Rarely are character and plot details shared early on. But we […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY The Performance of all Woody Allen movies at the Box Office!!!

_ Woody Allen Bob Hope Tonight Show 1971 Woody Allen Actor Director Writer Date Title (click to view) Studio Lifetime Gross / Theaters Opening / Theaters Rank 7/15/16 Cafe Society LGF $11,103,205 631 $359,289 5 18 7/17/15 Irrational Man SPC $4,030,360 925 $175,312 7 36 7/25/14 Magic in the Moonlight SPC $10,539,326 964 $412,095 17 […]

“WOODY WEDNESDAY” WOODY ALLEN TURNS 81 5 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE FILM GENIUS

__ The Woody Allen Special [1969] (Guests: Candice Bergen, Billy Graham and the 5th Dimension) Published on Sep 8, 2016 For all the Woody Allen/television fans, here is the rare 1969 CBS special! Featuring the flawless stand-up of Woody, and skits such as: Woody and Candice having to rehearse nude for an artistic play. A […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker

__ Woody Allen The Dean Martin Show Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker News18.com First published: December 1, 2016, 3:30 PM IST | Updated: December 1, 2016 One of the most celebrated filmmakers of Hollywood, Woody Allen turns 81 today. Born and raised in Brooklyn as Allen Konigsberg he is arguably […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering the first of several Vesper martinis. “I was terrified all day today, dude,”

___________ Justin Timberlake Talks ‘Trolls,’ Family Life and His New Album With Pharrell Williams Andrew Barker Senior Features Writer@barkerrant TOM MUNRO FOR VARIETY NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | 10:00AM PT Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen’s 81st Birthday

_ Woody Allen – standup – ’65 – RARE! Happy 81st Birthday, Woody Allen December 2, 2016 1 Comment Woody Allen turns 81 today. And he shows no signs of slowing down. Allen spent his 80th year being remarkably prolific, even by his own standards. The end of 2015 saw that year’s film, Irrational Man, […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016

  _ Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016 3 Comments Woody Allen has, it seems, wrapped production on his 2017 Film. The new film stars Kate Winlset and Justin Timberlake. And despite some very public days of shooting, We still don’t know that much […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 11

WOODY WEDNESDAY Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 11

The Best & The Rest: Every Woody Allen Film Ranked

This week, Woody Allen‘s 2016 title (for as we all know, there’s one each year), “Cafe Society,” starring Kristen Stewart, Jesse Eisenberg, Steve Carell, Corey Stoll, Blake Lively and Anna Camp, opens after a warm reception as the opening film at the most recent Cannes Film Festival. You can read our take from Cannes here, or hang on to scroll through and see where it lands on the list below, but we thought this would be a good time to gussy up our previous sprawling two-part Allen retrospective, and because we’ve been a little harmonious around here of late and miss the sounds of sobbing and breaking crockery, to rank it.

READ MORE: The Best And The Rest: Every Stanley Kubrick Ranked

Weathering personal scandal and coming in and out of fashion like flares, Allen’s been at constant work as a director for five decades now, and “Cafe Society” marks his 47th theatrically-released feature. Which means we have a lot to get through, so let’s get straight to it, shall we? Here, ranked worst to best, are all of Woody Allen’s theatrical features —with any list this long, there’s bound to be massive disagreement, so remember, the comments section awaits your ire. Or your congratulations, on the slim chance you agree with all of it.

Midnight in Paris (2011) Scene: “You ever hunted?”

Midnight in Paris (2011) Scene: “What are you writing?”/’Hemingway’.

midnight in paris – Fitzgeralds and Hemingway

MIDNIGHT IN PARIS official trailer in HD!

20. “Midnight in Paris” (2011)
Allen’s breezy ode to the City of Lights and to the 1920s Paris literary salon scene, is actually somewhat similar to “Cafe Society” in that they are both films that are nostalgic about nostalgia itself — in love with an idea of love that really only exists as an idea. Superficially quite simple, with an unexplained time-travel hook taking a struggling contemporary novelist (Owen Wilson) and plonking him down amidst his heroes HemingwayFitzgeraldGertrude Stein et al, the film is a fond, teary-eyed look at the glamor of the past and the danger of falling for what might have been instead of what is. Peppered with glittering cameos and supporting roles (Marion Cotillard, Corey Stoll, Kathy Bates, Allison Pill, Tom Hiddleston, Rachel McAdams, Michael Sheen etc) to our minds with its 4 Oscar nods and its glowing, adoring reviews, it was somewhat overpraised. But even if the reception was more a function of relief that, after a string of disappointments, an off-the-boil Allen seemed to be at least partially back on form, that doesn’t necessarily detract from the pleasures of this solid charmer either.

Vicky-Cristina-Barcelona-Woody-Allen-Scarlett-Johannson-Javier-Bardem-penelope-cruz19. “Vicky Cristina Barcelona” (2008)
It’s more more muskily sensual than is standard for Woody Allen, who usually displays a more intellectualized and ironic approach to sex, but “Vicky Cristina Barcelona” is still an enjoyable trifle, a kind of exoticized romp that’s not as deep as some fans like to make out, but doesn’t need to be. With this steamy 4-way love affair between some extremely attractive people, Allen’s migration to unfamiliar shores bears fruit, even if stakes remain relatively frivolous. Neurotic Vicky (Rebecca Hall) and free-spirited Cristina (Scarlett Johansson) cross paths with Juan Antonio (Javier Bardem) and his tempestuous ex-wife María Elena (a sexy and funny Penélope Cruz, who won an Oscar), and the culture-clashing comedy of manners that ensues is fizzy, awkward fun, until Maria Elena’s passionate nature takes a dark turn. It’s all a bit redolent of the myths about Latin lovers, but Cruz and Bardem have amazing chemistry (no wonder they hooked up afterwards) and the final scene suggests a sadness and a kind of wisdom that for once gives the characters depth as people rather than archetypes, however amusing those archetypes might be.

Related posts:

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen Videos

Woody Allen – Concerto Parigi 1996 – Wild Man Blues Woody Allen & The Eddy Davis New Orleans Jazz Band I have spent alot of time talking about Woody Allen films on this blog and looking at his worldview. He has a hopeless, meaningless, nihilistic worldview that believes we are going to turn to dust and there […]

“Woody Wednesday” ECCLESIASTES AND WOODY ALLEN’S FILMS: SOLOMON “WOULD GOT ALONG WELL WITH WOODY!” ( MIDNIGHT IN PARIS Paul Gauguin’s 3 questions examined!!!)

______________ Gauguin’s 3 Questions Paul Gauguin, now regarded as a French Post-Impressionist artist, was not received well by his old painter friends while living. And having abandoned his wife and children he had no options or resources for getting by. He never found artistic success, either critically or financially in his lifetime. However, there is […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES

______________ Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES Crisis in Six Scenes S01E01 CZ titulky Something about television brings out the nostalgist in Woody Allen (well, y’know, even more than usual), and understandably – it’s a medium inextricably tied to his own early days. He got his start as a staff writer for The Colgate Comedy […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux

First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux Another period piece is coming our way from writer-director Woody Allen. We know little about his latest movie, titled Wonder Wheel, which is typical of Allen’s movies. Rarely are character and plot details shared early on. But we […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY The Performance of all Woody Allen movies at the Box Office!!!

_ Woody Allen Bob Hope Tonight Show 1971 Woody Allen Actor Director Writer Date Title (click to view) Studio Lifetime Gross / Theaters Opening / Theaters Rank 7/15/16 Cafe Society LGF $11,103,205 631 $359,289 5 18 7/17/15 Irrational Man SPC $4,030,360 925 $175,312 7 36 7/25/14 Magic in the Moonlight SPC $10,539,326 964 $412,095 17 […]

“WOODY WEDNESDAY” WOODY ALLEN TURNS 81 5 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE FILM GENIUS

__ The Woody Allen Special [1969] (Guests: Candice Bergen, Billy Graham and the 5th Dimension) Published on Sep 8, 2016 For all the Woody Allen/television fans, here is the rare 1969 CBS special! Featuring the flawless stand-up of Woody, and skits such as: Woody and Candice having to rehearse nude for an artistic play. A […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker

__ Woody Allen The Dean Martin Show Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker News18.com First published: December 1, 2016, 3:30 PM IST | Updated: December 1, 2016 One of the most celebrated filmmakers of Hollywood, Woody Allen turns 81 today. Born and raised in Brooklyn as Allen Konigsberg he is arguably […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering the first of several Vesper martinis. “I was terrified all day today, dude,”

___________ Justin Timberlake Talks ‘Trolls,’ Family Life and His New Album With Pharrell Williams Andrew Barker Senior Features Writer@barkerrant TOM MUNRO FOR VARIETY NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | 10:00AM PT Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen’s 81st Birthday

_ Woody Allen – standup – ’65 – RARE! Happy 81st Birthday, Woody Allen December 2, 2016 1 Comment Woody Allen turns 81 today. And he shows no signs of slowing down. Allen spent his 80th year being remarkably prolific, even by his own standards. The end of 2015 saw that year’s film, Irrational Man, […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016

  _ Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016 3 Comments Woody Allen has, it seems, wrapped production on his 2017 Film. The new film stars Kate Winlset and Justin Timberlake. And despite some very public days of shooting, We still don’t know that much […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 10

________

 

 

The Best & The Rest: Every Woody Allen Film Ranked

This week, Woody Allen‘s 2016 title (for as we all know, there’s one each year), “Cafe Society,” starring Kristen Stewart, Jesse Eisenberg, Steve Carell, Corey Stoll, Blake Lively and Anna Camp, opens after a warm reception as the opening film at the most recent Cannes Film Festival. You can read our take from Cannes here, or hang on to scroll through and see where it lands on the list below, but we thought this would be a good time to gussy up our previous sprawling two-part Allen retrospective, and because we’ve been a little harmonious around here of late and miss the sounds of sobbing and breaking crockery, to rank it.

READ MORE: The Best And The Rest: Every Stanley Kubrick Ranked

Weathering personal scandal and coming in and out of fashion like flares, Allen’s been at constant work as a director for five decades now, and “Cafe Society” marks his 47th theatrically-released feature. Which means we have a lot to get through, so let’s get straight to it, shall we? Here, ranked worst to best, are all of Woody Allen’s theatrical features —with any list this long, there’s bound to be massive disagreement, so remember, the comments section awaits your ire. Or your congratulations, on the slim chance you agree with all of it.

Café Society Official International Trailer #1 (2016) – Jesse Eisenberg, Kristen Stewart Movie HD

Cafe Society22. “Cafe Society” (2016)
You can read our full review from Cannes here but suffice to say that given a few month’s to think about it, we stand by our largely positive take on his latest. It’s possible our opinion is a little colored by relief: having disliked “Irrational Man” enormously, we were worried that might be the end of us and Allen. But this fond and honeyed look at Golden-Age Hollywood and the era of New York gangsters and nightclubs is given a jolt of real life by a terrific Kristen Stewart, who somehow manages the trick that recent Allen muses like Emma Stone and Scarlett Johansson never quite did — of seeming like her own person and not an adjunct to the Allen proxy (here an almost-too-close-for-comfort Jesse Eisenberg). Coupled with the stunning photography (from legend Vittorio Storaro) and production design, Stewart’s luminescent and layered performance almost makes up for the film’s shortcomings elsewhere, like its bifurcated structure and the inevitable sense of overfamiliarity to some of the scenarios. But if this is mostly Allen riffing on Allen, at least he’s referencing his better films past.

Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex* (*But Were Afraid To Ask)21. “Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex* (*But Were Afraid To Ask)” (1972)
One of the more underrated entries in Allen’s ever-expanding oeuvre, “Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex* (*But Were Afraid to Ask),” based loosely on the self-help book by Dr. David Reuben, is an anthology film, made up of seven segments, each posing a different question. They vary wildly in terms of tone, and quality and allowed for Allen to experiment freely — so alongside the goofy “Do Aphrodisiacs Work?” section (which features the immortal image of Allen as a court jester) are artier entries like “Why Do Some Women Have Trouble Reaching an Orgasm?,” where Allen got to explore his love of European filmmaking. While it’s true the film is a collection of sketches rather than a cohesive whole, it’s still a jaunty, often hilarious and truthful film, too easily overlooked when thinking about his catalog. And it’s possible that the terrific, iconic segment in which Allen plays a bespectacled sperm is worth the price of entry (sorry) all by itself.

 

 

Related posts:

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen Videos

Woody Allen – Concerto Parigi 1996 – Wild Man Blues Woody Allen & The Eddy Davis New Orleans Jazz Band I have spent alot of time talking about Woody Allen films on this blog and looking at his worldview. He has a hopeless, meaningless, nihilistic worldview that believes we are going to turn to dust and there […]

“Woody Wednesday” ECCLESIASTES AND WOODY ALLEN’S FILMS: SOLOMON “WOULD GOT ALONG WELL WITH WOODY!” ( MIDNIGHT IN PARIS Paul Gauguin’s 3 questions examined!!!)

______________ Gauguin’s 3 Questions Paul Gauguin, now regarded as a French Post-Impressionist artist, was not received well by his old painter friends while living. And having abandoned his wife and children he had no options or resources for getting by. He never found artistic success, either critically or financially in his lifetime. However, there is […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES

______________ Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES Crisis in Six Scenes S01E01 CZ titulky Something about television brings out the nostalgist in Woody Allen (well, y’know, even more than usual), and understandably – it’s a medium inextricably tied to his own early days. He got his start as a staff writer for The Colgate Comedy […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux

First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux Another period piece is coming our way from writer-director Woody Allen. We know little about his latest movie, titled Wonder Wheel, which is typical of Allen’s movies. Rarely are character and plot details shared early on. But we […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY The Performance of all Woody Allen movies at the Box Office!!!

_ Woody Allen Bob Hope Tonight Show 1971 Woody Allen Actor Director Writer Date Title (click to view) Studio Lifetime Gross / Theaters Opening / Theaters Rank 7/15/16 Cafe Society LGF $11,103,205 631 $359,289 5 18 7/17/15 Irrational Man SPC $4,030,360 925 $175,312 7 36 7/25/14 Magic in the Moonlight SPC $10,539,326 964 $412,095 17 […]

“WOODY WEDNESDAY” WOODY ALLEN TURNS 81 5 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE FILM GENIUS

__ The Woody Allen Special [1969] (Guests: Candice Bergen, Billy Graham and the 5th Dimension) Published on Sep 8, 2016 For all the Woody Allen/television fans, here is the rare 1969 CBS special! Featuring the flawless stand-up of Woody, and skits such as: Woody and Candice having to rehearse nude for an artistic play. A […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker

__ Woody Allen The Dean Martin Show Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker News18.com First published: December 1, 2016, 3:30 PM IST | Updated: December 1, 2016 One of the most celebrated filmmakers of Hollywood, Woody Allen turns 81 today. Born and raised in Brooklyn as Allen Konigsberg he is arguably […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering the first of several Vesper martinis. “I was terrified all day today, dude,”

___________ Justin Timberlake Talks ‘Trolls,’ Family Life and His New Album With Pharrell Williams Andrew Barker Senior Features Writer@barkerrant TOM MUNRO FOR VARIETY NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | 10:00AM PT Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen’s 81st Birthday

_ Woody Allen – standup – ’65 – RARE! Happy 81st Birthday, Woody Allen December 2, 2016 1 Comment Woody Allen turns 81 today. And he shows no signs of slowing down. Allen spent his 80th year being remarkably prolific, even by his own standards. The end of 2015 saw that year’s film, Irrational Man, […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016

  _ Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016 3 Comments Woody Allen has, it seems, wrapped production on his 2017 Film. The new film stars Kate Winlset and Justin Timberlake. And despite some very public days of shooting, We still don’t know that much […]

 

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WOODY WEDNESDAY  Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 9

Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 1

The Best & The Rest: Every Woody Allen Film Ranked

This week, Woody Allen‘s 2016 title (for as we all know, there’s one each year), “Cafe Society,” starring Kristen Stewart, Jesse Eisenberg, Steve Carell, Corey Stoll, Blake Lively and Anna Camp, opens after a warm reception as the opening film at the most recent Cannes Film Festival. You can read our take from Cannes here, or hang on to scroll through and see where it lands on the list below, but we thought this would be a good time to gussy up our previous sprawling two-part Allen retrospective, and because we’ve been a little harmonious around here of late and miss the sounds of sobbing and breaking crockery, to rank it.

READ MORE: The Best And The Rest: Every Stanley Kubrick Ranked

Weathering personal scandal and coming in and out of fashion like flares, Allen’s been at constant work as a director for five decades now, and “Cafe Society” marks his 47th theatrically-released feature. Which means we have a lot to get through, so let’s get straight to it, shall we? Here, ranked worst to best, are all of Woody Allen’s theatrical features —with any list this long, there’s bound to be massive disagreement, so remember, the comments section awaits your ire. Or your congratulations, on the slim chance you agree with all of it.

Everyone Says I Love You25. “Everyone Says I Love You” (1996)
Lush with the sensation of romance in exotic places, Allen’s modern-day musical (scored with lip-synched 1930s standards) occupies a curious place in his oeuvre, following a family of Giuliani-era Upper East Side New Yorkers in romantic crisis in New York, Venice and Paris. Love has them all tangled up, from impulsive engagements to old flames flaring up again, that are all backdropped against the brownstones and Central Park foliage of New York or the bridges and waterways of the film’s European locations. But amid a very amiable ensemble (Alan Alda, Goldie Hawn, Drew Barrymore, Edward Norton, Natalie Portman, etc.) the film falters with Allen himself, who plays a single man who absconds to Venice to meet the girl of his dreams, played by Julia Roberts. The age discrepancy is glaringly unaddressed, and Roberts becomes one of the first casualties of Allen’s mid-period tendency to admire the beauty and vivacity of his younger female stars in lieu of giving them real notes to play. But the untrained and sometimes unsteady singing, which proved the most divisive element on release, might actually be our favorite part.

Radio Days24. “Radio Days” (1987)
Wedged somewhat awkwardly between one of Woody’s outright masterpieces and his run of explicitly ‘experimental’ fare, “Radio Days” often gets lost in the shuffle of the filmmaker’s busy period during the tail-end of the 1980s, but it merits revisiting as one of his most sophisticated, least ego-driven pictures. It engages in the stuff of romanticized autobiography (comparisons with Fellini’s “Amarcord” and Neil Simon’s “Brighton Beach Memoirs” abound) without tipping over into self-aggrandizing neurotica. True, there isn’t much here we haven’t seen before — in being a homage to the long-defunct radio era, it mimics a lot of the concerns of “The Purple Rose of Cairo,” or “Broadway Danny Rose” without ever quite attaining those films’ level of wit and warmth. But it’s still a spritely ode to eccentricity, an aping of the foibles of family life during the ’30s and ’40s, and a work that straddles the divide between the bleaker impulses of his output (Dianne Wiest’s lonely spinster repping here) and the pithy New Yorker humor and self-mockery that are often otherwise the opposing poles of his filmography.

Match Point Official Trailer!

Match Point23. “Match Point” (2005)
Given any 47-odd list of films to rank, there are going to be disagreements, and one sticking point we can predict in advance is the relatively low placement of this enduringly popular London-set thriller. But we’re sticking to our guns. Scarlett Johansson, at the very beginning of a run that saw her move from sexpot ingenue to one of our very favorite working actresses, is sulkily luminous, but not given a huge amount to do bar “be a fantasy” and while it should be a good thing that there’s no direct Allen stand-in for once, instead we get an emotionally and psychologically vague Jonathan Rhys-Meyers, and an empty-headed love affair that plays out against a London backdrop about as authentic as a series of postcards. Emily Mortimer and Matthew Goode are good value as the foils to the leads, but lacking the wit and snap that characterized the much, much better riff on the same themes that was “Crimes and Misdemeanors,” “Match Point” is not so much bad as slightly unnecessary, and dour in a way that feels uncharacteristic of even Allen’s most serious work.

Related posts:

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen Videos

Woody Allen – Concerto Parigi 1996 – Wild Man Blues Woody Allen & The Eddy Davis New Orleans Jazz Band I have spent alot of time talking about Woody Allen films on this blog and looking at his worldview. He has a hopeless, meaningless, nihilistic worldview that believes we are going to turn to dust and there […]

“Woody Wednesday” ECCLESIASTES AND WOODY ALLEN’S FILMS: SOLOMON “WOULD GOT ALONG WELL WITH WOODY!” ( MIDNIGHT IN PARIS Paul Gauguin’s 3 questions examined!!!)

______________ Gauguin’s 3 Questions Paul Gauguin, now regarded as a French Post-Impressionist artist, was not received well by his old painter friends while living. And having abandoned his wife and children he had no options or resources for getting by. He never found artistic success, either critically or financially in his lifetime. However, there is […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES

______________ Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES Crisis in Six Scenes S01E01 CZ titulky Something about television brings out the nostalgist in Woody Allen (well, y’know, even more than usual), and understandably – it’s a medium inextricably tied to his own early days. He got his start as a staff writer for The Colgate Comedy […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux

First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux Another period piece is coming our way from writer-director Woody Allen. We know little about his latest movie, titled Wonder Wheel, which is typical of Allen’s movies. Rarely are character and plot details shared early on. But we […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY The Performance of all Woody Allen movies at the Box Office!!!

_ Woody Allen Bob Hope Tonight Show 1971 Woody Allen Actor Director Writer Date Title (click to view) Studio Lifetime Gross / Theaters Opening / Theaters Rank 7/15/16 Cafe Society LGF $11,103,205 631 $359,289 5 18 7/17/15 Irrational Man SPC $4,030,360 925 $175,312 7 36 7/25/14 Magic in the Moonlight SPC $10,539,326 964 $412,095 17 […]

“WOODY WEDNESDAY” WOODY ALLEN TURNS 81 5 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE FILM GENIUS

__ The Woody Allen Special [1969] (Guests: Candice Bergen, Billy Graham and the 5th Dimension) Published on Sep 8, 2016 For all the Woody Allen/television fans, here is the rare 1969 CBS special! Featuring the flawless stand-up of Woody, and skits such as: Woody and Candice having to rehearse nude for an artistic play. A […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker

__ Woody Allen The Dean Martin Show Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker News18.com First published: December 1, 2016, 3:30 PM IST | Updated: December 1, 2016 One of the most celebrated filmmakers of Hollywood, Woody Allen turns 81 today. Born and raised in Brooklyn as Allen Konigsberg he is arguably […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering the first of several Vesper martinis. “I was terrified all day today, dude,”

___________ Justin Timberlake Talks ‘Trolls,’ Family Life and His New Album With Pharrell Williams Andrew Barker Senior Features Writer@barkerrant TOM MUNRO FOR VARIETY NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | 10:00AM PT Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen’s 81st Birthday

_ Woody Allen – standup – ’65 – RARE! Happy 81st Birthday, Woody Allen December 2, 2016 1 Comment Woody Allen turns 81 today. And he shows no signs of slowing down. Allen spent his 80th year being remarkably prolific, even by his own standards. The end of 2015 saw that year’s film, Irrational Man, […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016

  _ Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016 3 Comments Woody Allen has, it seems, wrapped production on his 2017 Film. The new film stars Kate Winlset and Justin Timberlake. And despite some very public days of shooting, We still don’t know that much […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY  Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 8

Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 1

The Best & The Rest: Every Woody Allen Film Ranked

This week, Woody Allen‘s 2016 title (for as we all know, there’s one each year), “Cafe Society,” starring Kristen Stewart, Jesse Eisenberg, Steve Carell, Corey Stoll, Blake Lively and Anna Camp, opens after a warm reception as the opening film at the most recent Cannes Film Festival. You can read our take from Cannes here, or hang on to scroll through and see where it lands on the list below, but we thought this would be a good time to gussy up our previous sprawling two-part Allen retrospective, and because we’ve been a little harmonious around here of late and miss the sounds of sobbing and breaking crockery, to rank it.

READ MORE: The Best And The Rest: Every Stanley Kubrick Ranked

Weathering personal scandal and coming in and out of fashion like flares, Allen’s been at constant work as a director for five decades now, and “Cafe Society” marks his 47th theatrically-released feature. Which means we have a lot to get through, so let’s get straight to it, shall we? Here, ranked worst to best, are all of Woody Allen’s theatrical features —with any list this long, there’s bound to be massive disagreement, so remember, the comments section awaits your ire. Or your congratulations, on the slim chance you agree with all of it.

 

another-woman-woody-allen-gene-hackman-gena-rowlands28. “Another Woman” (1988)
Allen’s late ’80s-early 90s period is his golden-brown period, insofar as it seems to be an autumnal detour (all of it done with DPs Sven Nykvist and Carlo DiPalmi), more dramatic and generally focusing on female protagonists in distress, with recurring themes of infidelity and unhappy marriage. This one, starring Gena Rowlands, Mia Farrow, Ian Holm, Blythe Danner and an underused but astonishingly great Gene Hackman falls a little too squarely into this camp. The small-scale picture (tellingly shot by Bergman regular Sven Nykvist) is indebted to “Wild Strawberries,” and centers on a woman (Rowlands) who begins to overhear the problems of a despondent woman (Farrow) as she talks to her psychiatrist neighbor. The conversations precipitate Rowlands to reflect on her past via dreamlike flashbacks which makes her realize how carelessly she alienated former friends and lovers. The two women’s stories do come full circle, but this small, polished well-performed portrait is most remarkable for the rounded, complex and not necessarily likeable, though wholly capable woman at its center.

Trailer Small Time Crooks -2000-

 

 

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small-time-crooks-woody-allen27. “Small Time Crooks” (2000)
We’re so used to seeing Allen as a neurotic intellectual that it’s sometimes refreshing to see him playing at the other end of the spectrum, and his role in “Small Time Crooks” is one of a small cluster of fully-flung idiots. Riffing, at least in part, on Ealing crime comedies like “The Ladykillers” and “The Lavender Hill Mob,” Allen plays Ray, a jailbird who plans to rob a bank next to a bakery, only to discover that the cookies that his wife Frenchy (an excellent Tracey Ullman) has been selling as cover for the heist are far more lucrative. That, frankly, is a genius conceit and it deserves a better film than “Small Time Crooks” ever becomes — it’s an oddly structured piece, and the middle act, featuring Hugh Grant as a sleazy artist parodying the class system, is pretty weak. Despite its unevenness, though, it’s mostly an enjoyable, bouncy ride and in a rare acting appearance by the great Elaine May, it has one of the greatest, if briefest, supporting performances in the Allen canon.

_Mighty-Aphrodite-Woody-allen26. “Mighty Aphrodite” (1995)
Probably best remembered as being the movie that won Mira Sorvino a Best Supporting Actress Academy Award before she fell into oblivion “Mighty Aphrodite” remains one of the better movies from a not-exactly-fertile period for Allen. While the story is fairly typical Woody — he is a father looking to identify the biological mother of his adopted son, while stressing out about his marriage (to Helena Bonham Carter) — the setup is enlivened by another typical flourish: a Greek chorus narration (led by F. Murray Abraham), which sometimes even interacts with the characters. Featuring an excellent Michael Rapaport as a Brooklyn knucklehead, the performance by Sorvino, as the squeaky-voiced hooker with a heart of gold, is also better than it is on the page (though maybe not quite to an Oscar-worthy degree). There are sadly some icky story beats (Allen sleeps with Sorvino at one point), that somewhat spoil the goodheartedness and earnest energy elsewhere, but the chorus conceit that keeps Allen’s character honest (kind of) also thankfully keeps the film from becoming too much of a Greek tragedy.

Related posts:

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen Videos

Woody Allen – Concerto Parigi 1996 – Wild Man Blues Woody Allen & The Eddy Davis New Orleans Jazz Band I have spent alot of time talking about Woody Allen films on this blog and looking at his worldview. He has a hopeless, meaningless, nihilistic worldview that believes we are going to turn to dust and there […]

“Woody Wednesday” ECCLESIASTES AND WOODY ALLEN’S FILMS: SOLOMON “WOULD GOT ALONG WELL WITH WOODY!” ( MIDNIGHT IN PARIS Paul Gauguin’s 3 questions examined!!!)

______________ Gauguin’s 3 Questions Paul Gauguin, now regarded as a French Post-Impressionist artist, was not received well by his old painter friends while living. And having abandoned his wife and children he had no options or resources for getting by. He never found artistic success, either critically or financially in his lifetime. However, there is […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES

______________ Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES Crisis in Six Scenes S01E01 CZ titulky Something about television brings out the nostalgist in Woody Allen (well, y’know, even more than usual), and understandably – it’s a medium inextricably tied to his own early days. He got his start as a staff writer for The Colgate Comedy […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux

First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux Another period piece is coming our way from writer-director Woody Allen. We know little about his latest movie, titled Wonder Wheel, which is typical of Allen’s movies. Rarely are character and plot details shared early on. But we […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY The Performance of all Woody Allen movies at the Box Office!!!

_ Woody Allen Bob Hope Tonight Show 1971 Woody Allen Actor Director Writer Date Title (click to view) Studio Lifetime Gross / Theaters Opening / Theaters Rank 7/15/16 Cafe Society LGF $11,103,205 631 $359,289 5 18 7/17/15 Irrational Man SPC $4,030,360 925 $175,312 7 36 7/25/14 Magic in the Moonlight SPC $10,539,326 964 $412,095 17 […]

“WOODY WEDNESDAY” WOODY ALLEN TURNS 81 5 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE FILM GENIUS

__ The Woody Allen Special [1969] (Guests: Candice Bergen, Billy Graham and the 5th Dimension) Published on Sep 8, 2016 For all the Woody Allen/television fans, here is the rare 1969 CBS special! Featuring the flawless stand-up of Woody, and skits such as: Woody and Candice having to rehearse nude for an artistic play. A […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker

__ Woody Allen The Dean Martin Show Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker News18.com First published: December 1, 2016, 3:30 PM IST | Updated: December 1, 2016 One of the most celebrated filmmakers of Hollywood, Woody Allen turns 81 today. Born and raised in Brooklyn as Allen Konigsberg he is arguably […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering the first of several Vesper martinis. “I was terrified all day today, dude,”

___________ Justin Timberlake Talks ‘Trolls,’ Family Life and His New Album With Pharrell Williams Andrew Barker Senior Features Writer@barkerrant TOM MUNRO FOR VARIETY NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | 10:00AM PT Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen’s 81st Birthday

_ Woody Allen – standup – ’65 – RARE! Happy 81st Birthday, Woody Allen December 2, 2016 1 Comment Woody Allen turns 81 today. And he shows no signs of slowing down. Allen spent his 80th year being remarkably prolific, even by his own standards. The end of 2015 saw that year’s film, Irrational Man, […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016

  _ Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016 3 Comments Woody Allen has, it seems, wrapped production on his 2017 Film. The new film stars Kate Winlset and Justin Timberlake. And despite some very public days of shooting, We still don’t know that much […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY  Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 7

Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 1

The Best & The Rest: Every Woody Allen Film Ranked

This week, Woody Allen‘s 2016 title (for as we all know, there’s one each year), “Cafe Society,” starring Kristen Stewart, Jesse Eisenberg, Steve Carell, Corey Stoll, Blake Lively and Anna Camp, opens after a warm reception as the opening film at the most recent Cannes Film Festival. You can read our take from Cannes here, or hang on to scroll through and see where it lands on the list below, but we thought this would be a good time to gussy up our previous sprawling two-part Allen retrospective, and because we’ve been a little harmonious around here of late and miss the sounds of sobbing and breaking crockery, to rank it.

READ MORE: The Best And The Rest: Every Stanley Kubrick Ranked

Weathering personal scandal and coming in and out of fashion like flares, Allen’s been at constant work as a director for five decades now, and “Cafe Society” marks his 47th theatrically-released feature. Which means we have a lot to get through, so let’s get straight to it, shall we? Here, ranked worst to best, are all of Woody Allen’s theatrical features —with any list this long, there’s bound to be massive disagreement, so remember, the comments section awaits your ire. Or your congratulations, on the slim chance you agree with all of it.

 

September31. “September” (1987)
Marked by a fabulous performance by Elaine Stritch, who plays an awful, incorrigible, selfish and self-centered mother, Allen’s “September” is a film play, for better and worse, marked by long takes and few cuts. An ambrosial picture about secrets and lies, unrequited love, and crushed hopes, it is a somber, Bergman-esque chamber drama about the deceits and romantic betrayals that occur during a late summer weekend getaway in upstate New York. The bittersweet-but-mostly-bitter drama stars Stritch, Mia Farrow, Dianne Wiest, Jack Warden, Denholm Elliott and Sam Waterston, and shows Farrow’s depressive character and others all pining for objects of affection they can never attain. The picture is no “Autumn Sonata” (Bergman’s 1979 late-era masterpiece, which this mother-daughter-centric film vaguely resembles), but it’s not without its powerfully emotional scenes, generally between Farrow, Wiest and Stritch. Interestingly enough, the picture was shot twice, as early attempts with Sam Shepard, Maureen O’Sullivan and Christopher Walken failed to create sparks.

30. “What’s Up, Tiger Lily?” (1966)
Allen receives credit for being an auteur, a filmmaker with a distinct voice and very specific, abstract political views on the relationships between others. But he began modestly, with the aim to make people lose their composure in a flood of laughs, and in his early years, it’s startling how easy that seemed. Allen didn’t “direct” (as in “shoot”) most of “What’s Up, Tiger Lily?,” but the film is an early, brilliant precursor to the “Mystery Science Theater 3000” school of film appreciation. Using footage from two films in a Japanese series called “International Secret Police,” Allen recontextualized and redubbed key moments to turn the spy film into a search for the perfect egg salad recipe. It’s a cinematic mixtape, in other words, a fan-edit of sorts with Allen routinely popping in to remind us that he was a questionable choice by the studio to re-edit the film in the first place. More of a stunt than an actual film, the picture remains remarkably funny today, a testament to how much Allen thoroughly understood film comedy, even with extremely limited resources.

Shadows and Fog

shadows-and-fog-woody-allen29. “Shadows and Fog” (1992)
Shot in luminous, shrouded black and white by Michelangelo Antonioni cinematographer Carlo DiPalmi, doing his best German Expressionist, G.W. Pabst and F.W. Murnau impression, the appropriately titled “Shadows and Fog” is an ambitious entry in the director’s catalog. Here, Allen takes the starring role in this 1920s-set Kafka-esque story, as a sniveling and cowardly bookkeeper who is caught up in a vigilante group’s search for a local serial killer (major hat tip to Fritz Lang‘s “M“). A second story, which eventually meets up with the first, revolves around a circus clown (John Malkovich) searching for his sword-swallower girlfriend (Mia Farrow) who gets mixed up in the intrigue happening in a nearby whorehouse. All swinging directional lights and scary streets where prowlers and angry mobs roam unfettered, and featuring an excellent supporting cast including John Cusack, Madonna, Kenneth Mars, Kathy Bates, Jodie Foster, Julie Kavner, William H. Macy, Wallace Shawn, and Lily Tomlin it’s a bit of a puzzle why “Shadows and Fog,” with so much going for it, remains so distant and feels so minor.

Related posts:

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen Videos

Woody Allen – Concerto Parigi 1996 – Wild Man Blues Woody Allen & The Eddy Davis New Orleans Jazz Band I have spent alot of time talking about Woody Allen films on this blog and looking at his worldview. He has a hopeless, meaningless, nihilistic worldview that believes we are going to turn to dust and there […]

“Woody Wednesday” ECCLESIASTES AND WOODY ALLEN’S FILMS: SOLOMON “WOULD GOT ALONG WELL WITH WOODY!” ( MIDNIGHT IN PARIS Paul Gauguin’s 3 questions examined!!!)

______________ Gauguin’s 3 Questions Paul Gauguin, now regarded as a French Post-Impressionist artist, was not received well by his old painter friends while living. And having abandoned his wife and children he had no options or resources for getting by. He never found artistic success, either critically or financially in his lifetime. However, there is […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES

______________ Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES Crisis in Six Scenes S01E01 CZ titulky Something about television brings out the nostalgist in Woody Allen (well, y’know, even more than usual), and understandably – it’s a medium inextricably tied to his own early days. He got his start as a staff writer for The Colgate Comedy […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux

First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux Another period piece is coming our way from writer-director Woody Allen. We know little about his latest movie, titled Wonder Wheel, which is typical of Allen’s movies. Rarely are character and plot details shared early on. But we […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY The Performance of all Woody Allen movies at the Box Office!!!

_ Woody Allen Bob Hope Tonight Show 1971 Woody Allen Actor Director Writer Date Title (click to view) Studio Lifetime Gross / Theaters Opening / Theaters Rank 7/15/16 Cafe Society LGF $11,103,205 631 $359,289 5 18 7/17/15 Irrational Man SPC $4,030,360 925 $175,312 7 36 7/25/14 Magic in the Moonlight SPC $10,539,326 964 $412,095 17 […]

“WOODY WEDNESDAY” WOODY ALLEN TURNS 81 5 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE FILM GENIUS

__ The Woody Allen Special [1969] (Guests: Candice Bergen, Billy Graham and the 5th Dimension) Published on Sep 8, 2016 For all the Woody Allen/television fans, here is the rare 1969 CBS special! Featuring the flawless stand-up of Woody, and skits such as: Woody and Candice having to rehearse nude for an artistic play. A […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker

__ Woody Allen The Dean Martin Show Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker News18.com First published: December 1, 2016, 3:30 PM IST | Updated: December 1, 2016 One of the most celebrated filmmakers of Hollywood, Woody Allen turns 81 today. Born and raised in Brooklyn as Allen Konigsberg he is arguably […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering the first of several Vesper martinis. “I was terrified all day today, dude,”

___________ Justin Timberlake Talks ‘Trolls,’ Family Life and His New Album With Pharrell Williams Andrew Barker Senior Features Writer@barkerrant TOM MUNRO FOR VARIETY NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | 10:00AM PT Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen’s 81st Birthday

_ Woody Allen – standup – ’65 – RARE! Happy 81st Birthday, Woody Allen December 2, 2016 1 Comment Woody Allen turns 81 today. And he shows no signs of slowing down. Allen spent his 80th year being remarkably prolific, even by his own standards. The end of 2015 saw that year’s film, Irrational Man, […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016

  _ Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016 3 Comments Woody Allen has, it seems, wrapped production on his 2017 Film. The new film stars Kate Winlset and Justin Timberlake. And despite some very public days of shooting, We still don’t know that much […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY  Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 6

Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 1

The Best & The Rest: Every Woody Allen Film Ranked

This week, Woody Allen‘s 2016 title (for as we all know, there’s one each year), “Cafe Society,” starring Kristen Stewart, Jesse Eisenberg, Steve Carell, Corey Stoll, Blake Lively and Anna Camp, opens after a warm reception as the opening film at the most recent Cannes Film Festival. You can read our take from Cannes here, or hang on to scroll through and see where it lands on the list below, but we thought this would be a good time to gussy up our previous sprawling two-part Allen retrospective, and because we’ve been a little harmonious around here of late and miss the sounds of sobbing and breaking crockery, to rank it.

READ MORE: The Best And The Rest: Every Stanley Kubrick Ranked

Weathering personal scandal and coming in and out of fashion like flares, Allen’s been at constant work as a director for five decades now, and “Cafe Society” marks his 47th theatrically-released feature. Which means we have a lot to get through, so let’s get straight to it, shall we? Here, ranked worst to best, are all of Woody Allen’s theatrical features —with any list this long, there’s bound to be massive disagreement, so remember, the comments section awaits your ire. Or your congratulations, on the slim chance you agree with all of it.

 

 

 

alice-woody-allen-mia-farrow33. “Alice” (1990)
A dissatisfied and spoiled middle-aged Manhattanite who gave up her career to raise a family (Mia Farrow) has her mundane, yet hyper-privileged world turned upside down when she meets what she believes is the man of her dreams (Joe Mantegna) at her children’s school. Feeling guilty about adultery she hasn’t even committed yet, Alice seeks out a Chinese herbalist and things take a turn for the whimsical and romantic. One herb gives her sexual confidence, another grants her powers of invisibility which she abuses to spy on the object of her affection, and another brings back a ghost of her past (Alec Baldwin, playing a reckless old boyfriend as an apparition) which allows her to relive old memories. Co-starring William Hurt, Blythe Danner and Judy Davis, while mildly cute the film — a loose reworking of Fellini’s “Juliet of the Spirits” with elements also clearly referencing episodes from “Alice in Wonderland” — is a little forgettable. But if it’s something of a misfire, it’s at least a well-intentioned and largely harmless one.

 

Deconstructing Harry – Trailer

 

______________

deconstructing-harry-woody-allen-elizabeth-shue-billy-crystal32. “Deconstructing Harry” (1997)
One of Allen’s most uncompromised, angriest works, “Deconstructing Harry” is unfortunately just too messy to really capitalize on its punchy energy. Allen plays Harry Block, a tortured writer who is undergoing a breakdown in his twilight years, as fantasy and reality begin to merge. While he has used his friends and family for inspiration frequently, his works start to come to life and intermingle with his own, throwing him into a tailspin as he also deals with a lover and a career honor he feels is undeserved. The film is one of Allen’s most autocritical works, taking to task both his critics and his own more onanistic tendencies, but it’s also filled with a number of absurdist touches provided by a peculiar all-star cast — look out for Billy Crystal in a memorable cameo as The Devil. “Deconstructing Harry” has moments of free-form hilarity, but the self-serving pettiness of his characters, while refreshingly unadorned, also make it difficult to really connect with this portrait of an artist in crisis, flailing and railing even as his work begins to cannibalize him.

Related posts:

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen Videos

Woody Allen – Concerto Parigi 1996 – Wild Man Blues Woody Allen & The Eddy Davis New Orleans Jazz Band I have spent alot of time talking about Woody Allen films on this blog and looking at his worldview. He has a hopeless, meaningless, nihilistic worldview that believes we are going to turn to dust and there […]

“Woody Wednesday” ECCLESIASTES AND WOODY ALLEN’S FILMS: SOLOMON “WOULD GOT ALONG WELL WITH WOODY!” ( MIDNIGHT IN PARIS Paul Gauguin’s 3 questions examined!!!)

______________ Gauguin’s 3 Questions Paul Gauguin, now regarded as a French Post-Impressionist artist, was not received well by his old painter friends while living. And having abandoned his wife and children he had no options or resources for getting by. He never found artistic success, either critically or financially in his lifetime. However, there is […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES

______________ Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES Crisis in Six Scenes S01E01 CZ titulky Something about television brings out the nostalgist in Woody Allen (well, y’know, even more than usual), and understandably – it’s a medium inextricably tied to his own early days. He got his start as a staff writer for The Colgate Comedy […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux

First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux Another period piece is coming our way from writer-director Woody Allen. We know little about his latest movie, titled Wonder Wheel, which is typical of Allen’s movies. Rarely are character and plot details shared early on. But we […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY The Performance of all Woody Allen movies at the Box Office!!!

_ Woody Allen Bob Hope Tonight Show 1971 Woody Allen Actor Director Writer Date Title (click to view) Studio Lifetime Gross / Theaters Opening / Theaters Rank 7/15/16 Cafe Society LGF $11,103,205 631 $359,289 5 18 7/17/15 Irrational Man SPC $4,030,360 925 $175,312 7 36 7/25/14 Magic in the Moonlight SPC $10,539,326 964 $412,095 17 […]

“WOODY WEDNESDAY” WOODY ALLEN TURNS 81 5 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE FILM GENIUS

__ The Woody Allen Special [1969] (Guests: Candice Bergen, Billy Graham and the 5th Dimension) Published on Sep 8, 2016 For all the Woody Allen/television fans, here is the rare 1969 CBS special! Featuring the flawless stand-up of Woody, and skits such as: Woody and Candice having to rehearse nude for an artistic play. A […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker

__ Woody Allen The Dean Martin Show Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker News18.com First published: December 1, 2016, 3:30 PM IST | Updated: December 1, 2016 One of the most celebrated filmmakers of Hollywood, Woody Allen turns 81 today. Born and raised in Brooklyn as Allen Konigsberg he is arguably […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering the first of several Vesper martinis. “I was terrified all day today, dude,”

___________ Justin Timberlake Talks ‘Trolls,’ Family Life and His New Album With Pharrell Williams Andrew Barker Senior Features Writer@barkerrant TOM MUNRO FOR VARIETY NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | 10:00AM PT Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen’s 81st Birthday

_ Woody Allen – standup – ’65 – RARE! Happy 81st Birthday, Woody Allen December 2, 2016 1 Comment Woody Allen turns 81 today. And he shows no signs of slowing down. Allen spent his 80th year being remarkably prolific, even by his own standards. The end of 2015 saw that year’s film, Irrational Man, […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016

  _ Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016 3 Comments Woody Allen has, it seems, wrapped production on his 2017 Film. The new film stars Kate Winlset and Justin Timberlake. And despite some very public days of shooting, We still don’t know that much […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY  Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 5

Ranking Woody Allen’s 47 movies!!!! Part 1

The Best & The Rest: Every Woody Allen Film Ranked

This week, Woody Allen‘s 2016 title (for as we all know, there’s one each year), “Cafe Society,” starring Kristen Stewart, Jesse Eisenberg, Steve Carell, Corey Stoll, Blake Lively and Anna Camp, opens after a warm reception as the opening film at the most recent Cannes Film Festival. You can read our take from Cannes here, or hang on to scroll through and see where it lands on the list below, but we thought this would be a good time to gussy up our previous sprawling two-part Allen retrospective, and because we’ve been a little harmonious around here of late and miss the sounds of sobbing and breaking crockery, to rank it.

READ MORE: The Best And The Rest: Every Stanley Kubrick Ranked

Weathering personal scandal and coming in and out of fashion like flares, Allen’s been at constant work as a director for five decades now, and “Cafe Society” marks his 47th theatrically-released feature. Which means we have a lot to get through, so let’s get straight to it, shall we? Here, ranked worst to best, are all of Woody Allen’s theatrical features —with any list this long, there’s bound to be massive disagreement, so remember, the comments section awaits your ire. Or your congratulations, on the slim chance you agree with all of it.

Whatever Works – Official Trailer!

whatever_works_woody-allen-larry-david35. “Whatever Works” (2009)
“Whatever Works” came out the same year as Ricky Gervais’ “The Invention of Lying,” a vanity picture some took as a latter-day incarnation of one of Allen’s high-concept comedies of the early 1970s. The film was, much like Gervais himself nowadays, a proud bore that asked you concurrently to pity it whilst taking it for the most hilarious thing ever made, evoking Allen’s legacy by stealing his favorite font (Windsor-EF Elongated, typography fans) for its opening titles. Audiences would have done better to check out Allen’s own work, which promised a return to New York after a muddled European caesura, a reworking of a lost script from the 1970s (a screenplay originally intended forZero Mostel) and one of Allen’s heirs apparent in the lead role. It doesn’t even come close to following through on that sublime set of circumstances, but “Whatever Works” is still fun for dyspeptic atheists everywhere: pitting the lacerating Larry David as a failed physicist against a world of “submentals” and “inchworms.” The Bible Belt hicks are way too broadly drawn, and a romance with Evan Rachel Wood brings in extraneous (and icky) autobiography, but “Whatever Works” is at the very least better than its reputation suggests.

 

______

MAGIC IN THE MOONLIGHT (2014) Official HD Trailer

_____

magic-in-the-moonlight-emma-stone34. “Magic in the Moonlight” (2014)
If not among the ranks of the very worst Allen films, then certainly one of the twee-est, this unconvincing but essentially well-meaning story sees Emma Stone and Colin Firth — both charming actors who do summon a little chemistry, though it’s far more platonic than romantic — lark about in a very poorly plotted mess of spiritualist malarkey. Wearing very pretty clothes — we’ll give it that — and decked out in appropriately lush Downton Abbey detailing, the warmed-over plot concerns a spirit medium (Stone) and the skeptic (Firth) whose determination to debunk her is complicated when he develops feelings for her. Words like “frothy” and “insubstantial” can often be turned into minor compliments, but here we mean them in the not-so-positive sense: “Magic in the Moonlight” is clearly supposed to be as feathery as gossamer and as ephemeral as moonlight, but there’s a fine line between airy effortlessness and treading water, and sadly it’s a line Allen crosses here. Still, it just about passes muster on a long-haul flight.

Related posts:

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen Videos

Woody Allen – Concerto Parigi 1996 – Wild Man Blues Woody Allen & The Eddy Davis New Orleans Jazz Band I have spent alot of time talking about Woody Allen films on this blog and looking at his worldview. He has a hopeless, meaningless, nihilistic worldview that believes we are going to turn to dust and there […]

“Woody Wednesday” ECCLESIASTES AND WOODY ALLEN’S FILMS: SOLOMON “WOULD GOT ALONG WELL WITH WOODY!” ( MIDNIGHT IN PARIS Paul Gauguin’s 3 questions examined!!!)

______________ Gauguin’s 3 Questions Paul Gauguin, now regarded as a French Post-Impressionist artist, was not received well by his old painter friends while living. And having abandoned his wife and children he had no options or resources for getting by. He never found artistic success, either critically or financially in his lifetime. However, there is […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES

______________ Woody Allen CRISIS IN SIX SCENES Crisis in Six Scenes S01E01 CZ titulky Something about television brings out the nostalgist in Woody Allen (well, y’know, even more than usual), and understandably – it’s a medium inextricably tied to his own early days. He got his start as a staff writer for The Colgate Comedy […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux

First Look at Woody Allen’s Next Movie ‘Wonder Wheel’ Posted on Tuesday, February 21st, 2017 by Jack Giroux Another period piece is coming our way from writer-director Woody Allen. We know little about his latest movie, titled Wonder Wheel, which is typical of Allen’s movies. Rarely are character and plot details shared early on. But we […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY The Performance of all Woody Allen movies at the Box Office!!!

_ Woody Allen Bob Hope Tonight Show 1971 Woody Allen Actor Director Writer Date Title (click to view) Studio Lifetime Gross / Theaters Opening / Theaters Rank 7/15/16 Cafe Society LGF $11,103,205 631 $359,289 5 18 7/17/15 Irrational Man SPC $4,030,360 925 $175,312 7 36 7/25/14 Magic in the Moonlight SPC $10,539,326 964 $412,095 17 […]

“WOODY WEDNESDAY” WOODY ALLEN TURNS 81 5 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE FILM GENIUS

__ The Woody Allen Special [1969] (Guests: Candice Bergen, Billy Graham and the 5th Dimension) Published on Sep 8, 2016 For all the Woody Allen/television fans, here is the rare 1969 CBS special! Featuring the flawless stand-up of Woody, and skits such as: Woody and Candice having to rehearse nude for an artistic play. A […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker

__ Woody Allen The Dean Martin Show Happy Birthday Woody Allen: 15 Quotes By The Maverick Filmmaker News18.com First published: December 1, 2016, 3:30 PM IST | Updated: December 1, 2016 One of the most celebrated filmmakers of Hollywood, Woody Allen turns 81 today. Born and raised in Brooklyn as Allen Konigsberg he is arguably […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering the first of several Vesper martinis. “I was terrified all day today, dude,”

___________ Justin Timberlake Talks ‘Trolls,’ Family Life and His New Album With Pharrell Williams Andrew Barker Senior Features Writer@barkerrant TOM MUNRO FOR VARIETY NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | 10:00AM PT Settling into a hotel bar in Soho after a long day shooting a film for Woody Allen in the Bronx, Justin Timberlake wastes no time ordering […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Woody Allen’s 81st Birthday

_ Woody Allen – standup – ’65 – RARE! Happy 81st Birthday, Woody Allen December 2, 2016 1 Comment Woody Allen turns 81 today. And he shows no signs of slowing down. Allen spent his 80th year being remarkably prolific, even by his own standards. The end of 2015 saw that year’s film, Irrational Man, […]

WOODY WEDNESDAY Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016

  _ Everything We Know About Woody Allen’s 2017 Film With Kate Winslet And Justin Timberlake October 16, 2016 3 Comments Woody Allen has, it seems, wrapped production on his 2017 Film. The new film stars Kate Winlset and Justin Timberlake. And despite some very public days of shooting, We still don’t know that much […]